Dead End to See Historic Tax Increases

By Staff Writer

In previous years grants and support have been given to the city, but none of the funds that were given have been accounted for.  The City Council is under investigation for multiple charges, which include tax fraud, evasion, misappropriation of government funds, and possibly racketeering.  The investigation has moved along silently in the background for over a month with few answers, but the amount of cash missing has gone up dramatically.

To counteract, and possibly pay off the missing money the city council has enacted the new Dead End City Improvement Fund.  With this fund the council promises to pay back the money that is missing, and bring the quality of life in Dead End back to pre-freeze levels.  This increase in fees is across the board.  Property and sales taxes will be the first to go up, effective immediately.  The adjusted statements will be in mailboxes within the next couple of days. A week after today the amount for licenses will go up.  Everything from buses and taxies, to bottles of booze and public land use permits will go up.

In a letter sent to my office on Friday night, the city council explained, “We have been looking for new and exciting ways to bring the city of Dead End back to life.  With our fast paced night life, an office of tourism should be made.  Expanding the reach of our law enforcement with cars that aren’t 15 years old, and ambulances that don’t smell like vomit.  These are exciting times to be in Dead End!”

This reporter is pretty sure that the city council is full of crap, but I have to write this shit anyway.  Fuck it.. I quit.  No reward is worth this! I wanted to be a lumberjack! Leaping from tree to tree in as they float down the mighty rivers of British Columbia! The giant redwood, LARCH, FERN! The mighty Scotch PINE!   The SMELL OF FRESH TIMBER! THE CRASH OF MIGHTY TREES! With my best girl by my side, we’d SING!

I mean… Fuck it, I quit.



((OOC note.. There are no actual Lindens charged for this plot.  Only the IC possibilities of prices rising.  Hopefully, this will lead to characters getting more desperate to make a buck.  For more information please check out.. )