Hunt on for Local Dildo-a-nator

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Local business owner  Lewis ” The Dildo-a-nator”  Hunter, as he prefers to be called,   is in some deep  trouble  after being caught doing some very bad things on the once pristine  streets of our fair  city.  He recently has taken over the local  pawn shop, though it seems this derelict businessman  prefers to linger in the grittier seedier side of  town... Read More

Bean Rally Turns to Chaos

Hail 45 Linked to Bean Rally Attack By: Tiffany Thorson: Staff Writer. At a recent rally for DE City Council Underdog, Bean Newport Yheng, we were shocked to see the candidate wasn’t actually at her own rally. Instead, she claims that the police captain Tarra Thorton had it out for her. So, it would be safer for all involved if she could live stream everything through a Joker... Read More

Bid for City Council Ends In Chaos

  Bid for City Council Ends in Chaos By: Cassie Nelson DE Daily Intern Editor   City council candidate Tarra Thorton was giving the first speech on the campaign trail today when suddenly shouts and shots rang out. Someone screamed that there was a bomb. I was under fire like so many brave journalists before me putting myself on the line to get the facts, for you, the... Read More

Local Porn Maverick Applies for City Council Position.

By: Cassie Nelson: Intern Editor In the kitchen of the Flick Your Bean Production Building there was a sparkle of energy as the owner and operator of Flick Your Bean Productions announced that she was going to run for one of the two city council seats on a Freak Power ticket. “You see, the city has become kinda dull and stuff, so I figured my platform will be, Make Politics... Read More

Rates Hike in DE Linked to City Investors.

Rates Hike in DE Linked to City Investors By: Tiffany Thorson Staff Writer   Dead End Savings and Loan has been a mainstay for Dead End residents for years. The bank was around when Harriet Fletcher set up her first hotel in 1867 and it has been there making loans for the people of Dead End ever since. That is until the housing bubble popped a few years ago, leaving the bank... Read More

Brutal Cop Arrests Victims and Leaves Injured to Suffer in Streets.

By: Tiffany Thorson, Staff Writer   I could feel my heart beating, and my eyes filling with tears as I lay in a puddle of what might have recently been a human, mixed with salsa. My face half dipped in the goop that was once a terrorist suspect. How did this happen to me? My entire body ached from the electrical charge that was sent through my body. I was simply trying to... Read More

Tarra Thorton Announces Candidacy for DE City Council

Police Capitan Tarra Thorton Announces Candidacy By: Tiffany Thorson: Staff Writer   At a party at the Dark Room, PD Capt. Tarra Thorton announces that she was planning to run for city council. As she was leaving after telling me that a file would be available to the press for the capture of the terrorist groups plaguing Dead End.   “But I will say this, as part of my... Read More

Founder’s Day in Dead End, A Celebration in History

Founder’s Day Celebrations coming to Dead End By: Cassie Nelson Intern Editor   The streets are alive with the celebration of Dead End’s founder’s week festivities. A The founder’s week celebration will celebrate over 200 years of Dead End history and the century that it has spent as an official city. The festivities that are supposed to start on Saturday April, 1st... Read More

Meet Dead End’s New Saviors

Meet Dead End’s Saviors By: Cassie Nelson Intern Editor Today I had the privilege of speaking with Dominic Morgan from Morgan and Morgan Investments. He is a member of one of the investment groups that Chairman Horn is working with to improve Dead End. The City Council has mixed reviews of Mr. Horn’s proposed investments. And, anger at the fact that he started taking out loans... Read More

Cult Activity and Shame Tacos

Cult Activity Alive in Dead End By: Cassie Nelson Intern Editor The Dead End town square has been the point of many activities, from lovely dates to criminal gang violence, and even the occasional religious event.  But lately, the square has taken a more mellow feel.  Until a few days ago, when the reports of pentagrams made from human blood were reported to the DEPD.  In that... Read More