Valentine’s Day Confessions

To help celebrate Valentine’s Day, the Dead End Daily will be running love letters from the citizens of Dead End. Starting today, you can submit your letters via the mail box in the office. Please be sure to include your love’s name, your confession of love, and your name if you wish to leave it – anonymous letters are encouraged. We also encourage you to set up dates through your letters, should you care to meet your victi — er, love. The letters will... Read More

Society: A night at the Dark Room – Leather & Lace Masquerade

Photos and story by C. Gambino The Dark Room held a Leather and Lace masquerade ball Jan. 10. The ball brought together many from the city for a night of fun, drinking and dancing and thankfully, no arrests or violence, aside from a well deserved spanking or two.  Read More

The Legend of Dead End Unboxed

By Karl Baca In the freezing afternoon of Jan. 8, the “informed” denizens of Dead End flooded the beach behind Lyss’ Lair. Through word of mouth and social media, these citizens found out that a certain “box” had an opportunistic lack of protection. This box of old had been previously reported last month , but coverage had died down due to the lack of professionals available for interviews. However, it does not take a professional to tell us Dead... Read More

Dead End Medical Hospital Develops Prosthetic Leg

by L. DH and K. Villota  Ms. Bonnie Jara and her new leg. Last week, Bonnie Jara, 22, Pawn Shop associate and Dead End Public Services waste director, was given a new prosthetic leg. The leg was presented to Jara by Dr. Princess Yheng, a physician at the Dead End Medical Hospital, during a news conference. Jara lost her leg in early December 2013 and received her new prosthetic leg close to the two-year anniversary of her accident. Dr. Yheng at Dead End Medical Hospital. Yheng,... Read More

Police and Fire Departments Hold A Snowman-Building Contest

by K. Villota On December 12, 2015 at 6:00 p.m., the Dead End Police Department and the Dead End Fire Department held a snowman-building contest and a snowball fight at the basketball courts. While no one actually entered the snowman-building contest, a number of snowmen of varying degrees of quality were seen on display. The Red Herring provided hot chocolate and cookies and the Slim Goodies Diner served food to all in attendance, while the Rough House provided alcoholic drinks... Read More

Pabulous Public Providers Party

by K. Villota Mr. Niimura Kyo at Lulu’s At 6:00 p.m. on December 5th, 2015, Lulu’s Bar and Grill held a Pabulous Public Providers Party offering half-price drinks for all of Dead End’s public servants. Citizens were invited to come and enjoy food, company, and music on the cold evening, with all proceeds graciously donated to the city’s winter works fund. Niimura Kyo, 29, a businessman, owner of Lulu’s Bar and Grill, and tattoo artist, described... Read More

Dead End Businesses Dress Up For Christmas

by K. Villota In keeping with the season, businesses in Dead End have gone all out with Christmas decorations to bring the holiday spirit into 2015. Let’s take a look at some downtown businesses’ end-of-year displays this year! Lulu’s Bar and Grill keeps it simple with a tree in one window and a menorah in another. Fancy kissing a dancer under the mistletoe? Lulu’s will make your dreams come true. Pharaoh’s Bookstore chooses to get etymological. The... Read More

Public Services Dead End Grand Opening

by K. Villota On the afternoon of Saturday, November 28th, 2015, Public Services Dead End (PSDE) held its grand opening at the basketball court near the Dead End diner. Xelan Yheng, 20, is the CEO of Public Services Dead End, a business that deals in waste management and city cleaning. She is also the owner of the Dead End Pawn Shop. Public Services Dead End has been commissioned by the city to keep the streets of Dead End clean through four activities: garbage collecting,... Read More

Black Friday Attack on the Pawn Shop

by K. Villota Around 6:00 p.m. on Black Friday, November 27, 2015, the Dead End Pawn Shop was attacked by a group of unknown people wearing dark clothing. Bashing in the door with baseball bats, they caused a commotion in the shop. A lawn gnome was seen thrown out the window, shattering into pieces on the ground. The DEPD tased two women who were suspected to be accomplices to the incident, including one with pink hair. It is not known as of press time who exactly the main attackers... Read More

Cult Delivers Chapel Sermon to Dead End Residents

by K. Villota On Saturday, November 14, 2015, the sermon of Belial began one hour late at 7:30 p.m. at the Dead Fall chapel. About twenty citizens of Dead End were in attendance, but many remained seated at the back, or milled around the entrance instead of coming in. Armed police were stationed outside the chapel, wearing gas masks. Sermon attendee Malakai Graestone, 22, is a Dead End Hellcat motorcycle club member. He said, “The cult, Belial or whatever it is, is holding... Read More